The truth of the matter is I left with a lot gone unsaid and a lot of brokenness. A lot of bitterness and broken hopes. An exit with a false ideas of who I am and what I was entitled to. I left with mask over my face and selfishness running through my veins. I left in the midst of hurt, anger and frustration towards the people I loved the most. People who have poured and poured and poured and poured and still are pouring their entire life into my sanctification, I have walked out on- Leaving their children questioning and hearts broken, and I have learned my actions effect many.
Still I know they love me and welcome me back with front door open and a dinner plate at the table just as though I had never left. But still, I want to make things right. I want to process through the rough and the messy from the past 10 months. I want to listen well to how I hurt and broke and make new of the mess I left. I want to return in an honest state of simply the broken Melanie Slates that is not running a childrens ministry or the intern of a mega church. But a daughter of the most high king who identifies me and gives all attention to me. A girl who yes, has a jacked up family that is being redeemed by God's grace alone. One who is under righteousness and grace just as those I read in scripture. One who is called to come and worship our sweet savior in the church out of complete thankfulness.
"Sometimes I just wish we could say
All the things that are easy to hear
Ignore the injustice we see
And explain every unanswered prayer
But I’d rather speak honestly
And wear a tattered heart on my sleeve
Cuz in the middle of my broken dreams
Redemption is here"
All the things that are easy to hear
Ignore the injustice we see
And explain every unanswered prayer
But I’d rather speak honestly
And wear a tattered heart on my sleeve
Cuz in the middle of my broken dreams
Redemption is here"
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